[ Cloud blinks, wide-eyed and almost defensively innocent when she gently cups his cheek. He looks bewildered, as if she just said the craziest thing. Let his emotions out? Over what? She's the one who was crying, pained by the suffering she watched... He was over it. He'd moved on...! ]
I'm okay. It happened a long time ago. I'm good, I...
[ He breathes again. Then sucks in a sharp breath on impulse. And for that crucial yet fleeting instant, he stares at her without saying another word. He looks into her beautiful blue eyes, rich as the sky. ...the same sky that Zack loved so much. Why was his vision blurry? He couldn't see her face. All he can do is gently lean into the hand cupping his cheek as the tears rolled down his face. ]
I...
[ Cloud wasn't lying. It happened a long time ago. He'd moved on. He stopped beating himself up over the deaths of Zack and Aerith. For his weakness in being incapable of stopping Sephiroth from reducing Nibelheim to ashes. Some scars never healed, and it was okay if they didn't. This pain...it's new. It's frustrating. And more potently...
It's torture. Cloud's lips form a tight line... And there it is. ]
Why...?
[ Cloud bows his head, heaving a sigh as his shoulders start to shake. His eyes burn with tears as the foundation he'd built crumbles like waves crashing through sand. Even his voice cracks. ]
Why did they bring them here?
[ Why did the Prismals bring Zack and Aerith back if they were just going to take them away? ]
Marie doesn't have an answer for that. Nobody that has been plunged from their home worlds really holds an answer to something that probably no one knows except the Gods. Her lips remain sealed, pressed in a thin line to mirror Cloud, as she watches him crumble under her gentle hand.
They're not here to solve that mystery anytime soon. She's more concerned about offering her utmost emotional support, rather than talk about possibilities and what-ifs. Even if an answer will relieve him, the sadness will remain sitting at the core of his chest. Marie needs to address that first. ]
I know, Master. I know it was cruel of them to bring your friends here. But the memories you had shared together... they will never fade, even though you can't see them again. And they're too precious to be tainted with sorrow and regret.
[ It's different, knowing that someone who had long died back home was brought here and pretty much forced into a second life. When those whom they left behind will have to experience loss a second time because of Prismatica's whims... she can barely understand what Cloud's friends must have felt, knowing they could have disappeared once again.
Marie can understand, though, how torn he is about the whole ordeal.
She hugs him close once more, planting a kiss close to his ear. ]
I believe it is important to focus on what had been, instead of what you have lost...
[ Before he'd come so far as to forgive himself and finally move on, Marie's words might have rang hollow. In one ear, out the other. But this time, it's like they go in...and get blocked from the other side. He'd say he feels trapped by her words, but the more appropriate way of describing this feeling was that he was being forced to face himself. Face his pain. Face his frustrations instead of bottling them away and putting it behind the width of his sword. Cloud's been smiling so much more these days. Happier despite the ups and downs this world provides.
And in the coming months, that happiness would only continue to grow. But every single time... Every fucking time. Something reminds him of his past failings. Attempts to drag him down. All he can do is feel the bubbling urge to growl and tell those voices to shut up. It's over. The past is the past. ...one that continues to be drudged up so he can practice saying goodbye again. ]
I know... [ The second Marie hugs him close, the kiss leaves a tingling warmth of Chroma that attempts to quell his aching heart and mind. So warm. So beautiful. ] I know.....
[ But it doesn't make the tears stop. How long did this take? How long did he hold this in? He doesn't even know where to put his hands right now. All he can feel is his hands gently fisting pristine fabric against her back. Finding some sort of purchase. But it's like he forgot how to hold someone. ]
I'm tired, Marie. I don't know. I- [ Cloud gives up. His hands slip down to her waist, limp as he weakly holds onto her and allows her to embrace him in kind. ] Sorry.
[ Why? He's saying words randomly now. He's so confused. What made him crumble? How did Marie make it so easy? So easy to tremble as he allows himself to press closer to her. She's warmer. Any farther away and he'd be left in the cold, it feels like. ]
[ She closes her eyes, calmly shedding tears that she knows won't hold relevance against the suffering of a man who has lost as much as she did. The past, for her, was centuries ago - she had a lot of time, as a spirit, to work out her sorrows and find some bit of peace despite how violently and horribly she died, how lonely it had been.
But Cloud's pain is so recent, she can't expect him to recover from that quickly and efficiently. The best course right now is to sit here and cry it out and say all that he wants and needs to say. It's better than going out there and hurt himself in some way, out of anger and despair. He's a Sanguis, so that's already risky in itself.
Maybe it won't be a bad idea to keep him here for the time being, until he calms down... ]
It is tiring, having to face such turmoil. That is why I will not be leaving your side.
[ She embraces him tighter, strokes his hair, brings him against her chest. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[ Cloud blinks, wide-eyed and almost defensively innocent when she gently cups his cheek. He looks bewildered, as if she just said the craziest thing. Let his emotions out? Over what? She's the one who was crying, pained by the suffering she watched... He was over it. He'd moved on...! ]
I'm okay. It happened a long time ago. I'm good, I...
[ He breathes again. Then sucks in a sharp breath on impulse. And for that crucial yet fleeting instant, he stares at her without saying another word. He looks into her beautiful blue eyes, rich as the sky. ...the same sky that Zack loved so much. Why was his vision blurry? He couldn't see her face. All he can do is gently lean into the hand cupping his cheek as the tears rolled down his face. ]
I...
[ Cloud wasn't lying. It happened a long time ago. He'd moved on. He stopped beating himself up over the deaths of Zack and Aerith. For his weakness in being incapable of stopping Sephiroth from reducing Nibelheim to ashes. Some scars never healed, and it was okay if they didn't. This pain...it's new. It's frustrating. And more potently...
It's torture. Cloud's lips form a tight line... And there it is. ]
Why...?
[ Cloud bows his head, heaving a sigh as his shoulders start to shake. His eyes burn with tears as the foundation he'd built crumbles like waves crashing through sand. Even his voice cracks. ]
Why did they bring them here?
[ Why did the Prismals bring Zack and Aerith back if they were just going to take them away? ]
no subject
Marie doesn't have an answer for that. Nobody that has been plunged from their home worlds really holds an answer to something that probably no one knows except the Gods. Her lips remain sealed, pressed in a thin line to mirror Cloud, as she watches him crumble under her gentle hand.
They're not here to solve that mystery anytime soon. She's more concerned about offering her utmost emotional support, rather than talk about possibilities and what-ifs. Even if an answer will relieve him, the sadness will remain sitting at the core of his chest. Marie needs to address that first. ]
I know, Master. I know it was cruel of them to bring your friends here. But the memories you had shared together... they will never fade, even though you can't see them again. And they're too precious to be tainted with sorrow and regret.
[ It's different, knowing that someone who had long died back home was brought here and pretty much forced into a second life. When those whom they left behind will have to experience loss a second time because of Prismatica's whims... she can barely understand what Cloud's friends must have felt, knowing they could have disappeared once again.
Marie can understand, though, how torn he is about the whole ordeal.
She hugs him close once more, planting a kiss close to his ear. ]
I believe it is important to focus on what had been, instead of what you have lost...
no subject
And in the coming months, that happiness would only continue to grow. But every single time... Every fucking time. Something reminds him of his past failings. Attempts to drag him down. All he can do is feel the bubbling urge to growl and tell those voices to shut up. It's over. The past is the past. ...one that continues to be drudged up so he can practice saying goodbye again. ]
I know... [ The second Marie hugs him close, the kiss leaves a tingling warmth of Chroma that attempts to quell his aching heart and mind. So warm. So beautiful. ] I know.....
[ But it doesn't make the tears stop. How long did this take? How long did he hold this in? He doesn't even know where to put his hands right now. All he can feel is his hands gently fisting pristine fabric against her back. Finding some sort of purchase. But it's like he forgot how to hold someone. ]
I'm tired, Marie. I don't know. I- [ Cloud gives up. His hands slip down to her waist, limp as he weakly holds onto her and allows her to embrace him in kind. ] Sorry.
[ Why? He's saying words randomly now. He's so confused. What made him crumble? How did Marie make it so easy? So easy to tremble as he allows himself to press closer to her. She's warmer. Any farther away and he'd be left in the cold, it feels like. ]
no subject
But Cloud's pain is so recent, she can't expect him to recover from that quickly and efficiently. The best course right now is to sit here and cry it out and say all that he wants and needs to say. It's better than going out there and hurt himself in some way, out of anger and despair. He's a Sanguis, so that's already risky in itself.
Maybe it won't be a bad idea to keep him here for the time being, until he calms down... ]
It is tiring, having to face such turmoil. That is why I will not be leaving your side.
[ She embraces him tighter, strokes his hair, brings him against her chest. ]
You are going to be alright. Stay with me, Cloud.